http://jefm.net/nucleus/ en-us Nucleus CMS v3.21 © Weblog http://backend.userland.com/rss http://jefm.net/nucleus//nucleus/nucleus2.gif http://jefm.net/nucleus/ http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=188 ]]> General http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=188 Wed, 21 Nov 2007 14:47:00 -0700 http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=187
Rule 2. If you absolutely MUST use the stall next to me, if you ate Thai for lunch, or you are having some kind of intestinal crisis and just can't make it to the other bathroom, then wait until I leave before you exit your stall. DO NOT come out at the same time I do or while I am still washing my hands. I do not want to make eye contact with you and I certainly do not want to make idol conversation with a crapper-mate. What if I look down and happen to see something on your hands that shouldn't be there? I will never shake your hand again, that's for sure. Give me a minute to exit the bathroom. Trust me, I'm in a hurry to get out of there to avoid a bonding moment anyway, so just play another round of free-cell on your phone or something.

I realize this protocol probably doesn't apply to woman. They have different routines, more stalls and less of an alpha nature. But for men, I believe these truths to be self-evident.

That is all.]]> The Office http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=187 Thu, 23 Aug 2007 17:46:45 -0700 http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=186 Okay, it has gotten to the ridiculous point now. This heat is completely out of control and I don't understand what the point of it is....GOD.

Walking out of my office and into the parking lot is like walking into a blast furnace. The other day, the outside thermometer in my car said 109 degrees!! 109!! I realize that is the asphalt temperature, but still, shouldn't bad things begin happening at 109 degrees? I would think house pets would begin to explode or something. And if traffic stops, shouldn't the tires start melting on the pavement? This ain't global warming, it's global scorching and I just don't see the point...GOD!]]> General http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=186 Fri, 17 Aug 2007 07:27:40 -0700 http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=185 Camp Horizon. If you want to know what I do there, you can read the journal I kept several years ago. This year was a little different in that I was totally out of shape. At first, I thought it was my age catching up to me, but now I am pretty sure it was the extra 20 pounds I took with me.One funny incident came on the evening we were treated to a magic show. The magician was pretty good if you like that kind of thing. Personally, I find magic acts kind of cheesy but the kids loved it. At one point, the magician did a trick with several items of junk food - nuts, chips, soda, cookies, etc. At the end of the trick, he handed out the junk food to some “lucky kids” in the audience. My camper was the lucky recipient of the cookies. He was beaming when he got them. Later in the act, the magician turned a one-dollar bill into a five-dollar bill and handed that to a young lady in the first row. My camper looked at the young lady and then at his cookies and exclaimed “What the hell?”

A not so funny incident occurred when I got home and got the bill for all the text messaging I did with girlfriend while at camp. I thought I had unlimited text messaging when in fact I had “starter 200”. STARTER 200, can you believe that?! The training wheels of text messaging! Nice $82 lesson.
]]> General http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=185 Tue, 07 Aug 2007 19:42:56 -0700 http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=184
I actually found myself hoping for some carnage here just so I could be vindicated. I know, that is wrong and totally unfair to these little bastards, but you know what? Smashing your thumb while trying to hit a roll of caps with a hammer is REALLY unfair....

]]> General http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=184 Mon, 09 Jul 2007 23:30:09 -0700 http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=182
Upside: I'm in sunny California and the weather is euphoric.
Downside: I'm here on business and I'm too exhausted to do anything.

Upside: I am disconnected from everyday problems; I only have to focus on me.
Downside: I've been here a week, I am ready to go home.

Upside: I've met lots of new people.
Downside: One of those bastards gave me a nasty cold!

Upside: My associates want to cash in on my new “Barry White Voice” at the Karaoke bar.
Downside: I might just do it.]]> General http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=182 Tue, 26 Jun 2007 22:40:45 -0700 http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=181 don't come close to winning, but I never even get just ONE damn number right. How is that even possible? I should win something for being the worst lottery player ever.]]> General http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=181 Thu, 14 Jun 2007 20:37:39 -0700 http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=180 That looks like the that ruined my camera a few years back!]]> Graphic http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=180 Tue, 12 Jun 2007 21:39:37 -0700 http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=179 Bad power steering pump one week later....................$900
Transmission gone to live with Jesus two weeks later....$8,000

Development of permanent psychotic twitch...............You got it]]> General http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=179 Mon, 11 Jun 2007 20:08:37 -0700 http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=178
Ewa Sowinska, ombudsman for children's rights, said in the latest edition of a magazine that the purse-carrying character on the British Broadcastinhg Corp.'s “Teletubbies” children's show could promote homosexuality.

Journalists from the weekly “Wprost” mentioned claims the “Teletubbies” promote homosexuality, to which Sowinska replied that she had heard of the issue. The journalists then asked about Tinky Winky.

“I noticed that he has a purse, but I didn't realize he's a boy. At first I thought that must be a bother for him,” Sowinska told the magazine in an interview her office approved before publication. “Later I learned that there could be some .”]]> Graphic http://jefm.net/nucleus/index.php?itemid=178 Tue, 29 May 2007 22:18:42 -0700